Friday, December 3, 2010

This May Just Be the Beer Talking..,

(Disclaimer: I am NOT a drinker. At all. I can handle my liquor with the best of them. I am unlikely to finish a small glass of wine over 3 hours much the less an entire bottle of beer over an evening. Tonight, I have finished one and am working on a 2nd. The finished bottle is the first completed alcoholic beverage I have had since the beginning of June - 6 months ago.)

And now onto the blogging. :)

I'm scared about tomorrow. Truly.

For the first time since our family's beginnings, we will be in a church, together, celebrating Mass.

I know this sounds stupid to the average Lookie Lou...but I'm scared.

My husband has attended church with me precisely 4 times since we were wed (which, btw, was NOT in a church but an outdoor garden).

1. I was singing at my parent's church for Memorial Day and he came and hid in the back.
2. The memorial service for Sgt. William S. Kinzer, the soldier killed in Iraq in the same vehicle he was wounded in.
3. A Christmas Eve service back in 2005 when I was singing. He hid in the cry room.
4. A Christmas time service when I and our son were singing in 2007. He hid in the back.

That's it.

We have never SAT as a family and worshiped. In a pew. With other people. On purpose. EVER.

This is an experience I have looked forward to my entire marriage and now that I sit on the evening before it will finally come to pass I am absolutely 100% terrified.

I love my husband. I trust him with my life...but I'm scared out of my wits right now for absolutely no good reason.

Tomorrow evening, he will set foot in a Catholic Church for the first time in over 10 years...and I will be by his side.

The joy, the relief, the fear, the anxiety. I had less tension in my body before performing at Carnegie Hall. :)

1 comment: